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The Decapitation Machine

Jimmy Writer
submitted by

Tags: extreme

A text discussing how a girl should be snuffed for her meat to have the best taste.

A girl ready for decapitation
It really came down to a lack of quality control, you know, this ever increasing
demand from Government regulatory authorities and carping of never satisfied
house husbands.
Yes. house husbands, for ever since the advent of women becoming the providers,
they expected their men to do the house work. A matter of fairness, they said.
If women had to be the meat winners, then the men could do the chores.
Great except that men had always been fussier about their food, especially their
meat, than their women. So the complaints started, all of them centring around a
common theme; inconsistency of texture and taste.
There were Commissions of Inquiry and hearings before the Senate of the
Federation of Independent States. There was even a time when the whole program
of Girl Meat was at risk for the planet's women were about to withdraw the
services of their girls.
"Let them eat cake" the placards trumpeted as hundreds of thousands of women and
potential food girls demonstrated on Piccadilly and down Constitution Avenue and
outside the Lubyanka on Dzerzinski Park and in Tianamin Square.
The Federation's finest meatologists took samples from girl carcases world wide
to determine what it was that gave them their widely differing characteristics.
It could not be the food they were given after being taken in as stores girls
for all had been fed the same pellets since the program's introduction, the
world having buried the last cloned six legged sheep two centuries before.
It could not be differing environmental conditions in which girls were bred and
matured for their eighteen years before being suitable for processing for the
whole planet lived in climate controlled air conditioned glass domes.
Yet still girl meat lacked what ancient cow, pig and sheep meat had, consistency
of texture, tenderness and flavour.
So what could the cause be if all girls were born in identical circumstances,
fed on identical pellets, lived in the comfort and idleness in which they have
always thrived and then were processed at the same age.
What, the meatologists asked, was common to all meat girls, but was so different
as to cause a world crisis of confidence in this essential staple of man, the
last source of good red meat?
Then they discovered the break in the chain of commonality for if all girls
lived the same life it had to be that they did not share the same death.
There was no standard way set down to kill them.
Certainly most girls were processed by having their throats cut, but these were
cut in a dozen different poses, with the girl prepared for her death in a dozen
different ways.
Some girls had their throats cut laying on a draining table, others with their
heads held over a sink while others, where the processor believed in the rapid
draining of the blood, were suspended from their ankles before feeling the
And there were other works in which the proprietor insisted that girl meat
always tasted better if her blood was not drained away immediately at all so
these were slowly bled to death while others claimed the only girl meat worth
having was that in which the blood remained in her body until well after her
death so these girls were hanged or garrotted or simply strangled to death by
hand before being bled.
Then there was the matter of preparing the girl for her death.
Some left her alone and at peace with herself for an hour before processing
believing that girl meat tasted best if she spent her final moments of life
relaxed while others loved the taste of adrenalin and so caused her great fear
by positioning her for butchering and playing with the knife in front of her
eyes or even inflicting pain before killing her.
Then there was the matter of sex before death.
Should a girl be allowed to enjoy a last turn in the hay before being killed or
should she be required to undergo abstinence for a day. Indeed did it make any
difference to her flavour if her butcher took the last small favour her live
body could offer him provided, of course, he did not bruise her flesh?
The Union of Meat Girls had something to say about this last variable, you had
better believe, as they did about the state of dress or otherwise which ought to
adorn their bodies for death notwithstanding that it had been standard practice
to kill table girls naked for over a hundred years.
Some Union reps even had a Paris house of haute couture design a recommended
gown which was based on a formal wedding dress complete with veil and which the
girl herself was to lift, not to be kissed, but to bare her throat for its
eternal decoration!
Then there was the variation in views as to how to handle her dead body prior to
Should it be cut up warm. Does washing the inside of a cleansed out girl spread
bacteria or remove it. At what temperature should her body be stored and for how
The debate seemed to have no end without State direction.
And so it came to pass that the final Commission of Inquiry chaired by the
Meatologist General set down the following standards for the production of girl
meat for human consumption.
All girls shall be killed by decapitation upon a machine approved by the
office of the Meatologist General ( see design details below).
All girls shall be killed whilst devoid of all clothing, but shall have a
cloth shield fitted over their shoulders ( see image depiction above).
Girls may indulge in sex but not within the period beginning one hour prior
being processed.
All girls shall lie upon the surface of the decapitation machine for not less
than one minute nor not more than two prior to its activation ( see details
below ).
Basic Design Features of an Approved Apparatus for Decapitation.

1. The bench upon which the girl lies for the prescribed period shall slope
towards her head at an angle of not less than twenty five degrees to ensure a
complete blood drain of her body.

2. The girl's head shall be allowed to hang free stretching her neck back in
order that the wire decapitator enters her throat inside the neck rest at an
angle thus ensuring the maximum wound area at the point of separation. This,
too, is to ensure rapid and complete draining of her blood.

3. No dead girl's body may be removed from its draining position until a period
of not less than ten minutes has transpired.

4. Upon the body being thoroughly drained of its blood, it shall immediately be
cleaned out and washed down with sterilised and chilled water.

5. The girl's body, one cleansed, shall be forthwith hung inverted in a purpose
built room, the temperature of which shall not exceed three degrees Celsius, for
a period of not less than twelve hours before it can be dissected and packaged
for sale.
And thus, to the relief and immense satisfaction of all concerned, the problem
was solved.

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